The day I return to
Let me tell you about the night these two characters collided, but never met.
On April 2, 2005 at 9:37 p.m., the church bells started chiming in
I would have to pay him a courtesy visit that night of bells and tinnitus, to say something, anything, in my broken Polish. The country is rife with unspoken rules that govern the business of death.
He and I never exchanged more than a few words of greeting. When I would sneak home with young men I had plucked from the only gay club in the city — on the edge of town, without a sign — he would be watching, smiling. He knew.
Ryszard, I usually hate secrets, but I will soon explain why I was thankful he kept my homosexuality hidden from the neighbours.
Surely, I could find something to say to him. After all, this was the end of life for Karol Wojtyla, the young man from rural
But I had mixed feelings about this pope, and wasn’t sure I was in the mood to chat. John Paul II strengthened HIV/AIDS by championing the
It was 9:38. The bells had been ringing for a solid minute, and I couldn’t think of anything to say to my straznik.
I was shocked by what happened in the days following the Pope’s death: a complete national meltdown. Schools and businesses were shuttered. Giant pictures of the pontiff went up in the windows of practically every home, supermarket, shop and streetcar.
Throughout the week, MTV Poland played sound-clips of JP II shouting between Led Zeppelin and Queen songs, "Do not be afraid!"
But how could I not?
When you banned the Poznan Equality March in 2005, stating that it posed "a significant danger to public morality," did you mistake the Polish constitution and its freedom of assembly clause for a piece of toilet paper? Your police officers arrested the brave few who demonstrated peacefully, who also had to deal with right-wing groups throwing rocks, and according to Amnesty International, shouting "Let’s gas the fags" and "We’ll do to you what Hitler did to Jews."
That sentiment, unfortunately, was felt on a much wider scale. The BBC has quoted Polish President Lech Kaczynski as saying that the human race "would disappear if homosexuality was freely promoted."
I wasn’t the only one afraid; these were scary times for everybody.
But volatility is no excuse for institutionalized hatred, and it certainly doesn’t justify your government’s treatment of Ninio the elephant.
It appears that Ninio, the latest addition to the local zoo, is rather physically affectionate with his fellow male pachyderms, so much so that it prompted your colleague and city counsellor Michal Grzes to fume in the Daily Mail, "We didn’t pay 37 million zlotych ($13M) for the largest elephant house in
Oh yes, you did! Now Grzes wants to get rid of him, but there are friends of Ninio — including an army of
Back to my apartment. It was 9:45, and my tongue was still molten lead. What a night to be speechless.
With no words of comfort for my straznik, I decided to give him something else instead. I padded down the building’s darkened stairs in my socks, and knocked on his door. He was reading a newspaper; I found it strange that the radio was off. We nodded to each other and something timeless passed between us, through vapours of vodka and aftershave. I handed him my only response to the night’s events: a lit, windproof candle. What a cliché, I thought, and then quickly corrected myself — no, it’s a tradition.
He accepted the candle graciously. I miss him so.
Ryszard, I am writing to thank you for granting permission to the Poznan Equality marchers from 2006 onward, and for providing police protection to them. If you do not continue to accord full civil rights to the sexual and gender minorities of your city, they will fight twice as hard for their freedom. They will continue to defy bans and to make themselves heard, and they will seek support from the international community, including from the European Court of Human Rights. They will tear down the silence built around them until they can live in an atmosphere of tolerance and anti-discrimination.
Open your window and listen. That is the sound of the Queer Solidarity Movement, and the sound of an elephant that wants to fuck in peace.